On the Fly (over)

Again, the national media portrays Chicagoans as dumbass hayseeds. Maybe we are.

First of all, until last night, I’d never heard of “Jimbo’s”, the South Side bar where FOX placed a camera to capture the reaction of Sox fans during last night’s Game 4. FOX opened the telecast by ‘interviewing’ a female Sox fan as she bragged about the Sox. The woman they spoke to is the “stereotypical” Chicago woman (an “Antoinette”, I call them*): Heavy set, bleached hair in a manly short cut, obviously a smoker (deep, flemmy voice), not especially attractive.

If the situation were reversed and they were in a Houston bar speaking with a woman, she would be a tall, big-haired attractive blonde, buxom, in a western shirt, possibly wearing a cowboy hat, speaking with the cutest drawl (you know, the one that I threw a perfectly good education away for).

At least we didn’t have any car burnings or rampant vandalism with this championship. I guess a World Series win is not cause for looting, unlike NBA championship. (Subtle racism somewhat intended).
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*Chicago men are all “Anthony”, or Ant’ny, as it is pronounced.

Go Go Sox

Congratulations to the Chicago White Sox.  We Cub fans will just have to deal with it; and perhaps learn something from it as well.

Swoopes, there it is !

Sheryl Swoopes is a fantastic basketball player and a role model for not only women athletes, but the rest of us as well.

Her private life is hers.  She’s not breaking any laws in my state, and she’s not denigrating my lifestyle.  

Good luck next season, I say.

Wilma !

It's not that I'm tired of all the hurricanes, and I'm not tired of the hurricane victim stories.

Officials in the Keys and southern Florida ordered people to evacuate. Some did, others did not. What I'm tired of is hearing people on the radio who wouldn't leave as requested complain about the intensity of the storm and say "I didn't think it was going to be that bad". Mind you, these were people who had the means to leave, but chose not to.

You people. I'm tired of you.

On the Verge...

I believe that I am ready to explode creatively and produce not only an album, but a screenplay as well.

A marketable screenplay.

In the meantime, stay tuned for a multiple post in praise of the 1972-1979 works of Dan Fogelberg.

But first...

Artist James Plakovic www.plakovic.com gave me a couple of CD's with an eclectic mix of music. One of the tracks was an orchestral arrangement of "Baba O'Riley". I am a huge fan of Pete Townsend (thanks to James) and this is what I must say about that track:

It is often the case that the true genius of an artist is revealed in the interpretation of his works.

Whoever took the time and talent to create this arrangement of Baba is to be cherished and held in awe.

.....As Baba should be.

I am a Total Bastard

The following is sarcasm...I don't really believe this. It's a shame some people take me seriously.

I am not the most sensitive, politically correct guy:

A month ago, Islamist terrorist groups were heralding the destruction caused by Hurricanes Katrina and Rita as the righteous wrath of Allah on the spawn of satan that is America. Approximately 1200 people died as a result of those storms.

The earthquake in Afghanistan, India, and Pakistan (the summer home of Al Queda) caused over 40,000 deaths.

My God is 40 times more powerful than your god. Deal with it.

On a related, politically incorrect note: That region is prone to earthquakes. You'd think that those governments would have adopted and enforced more stringent building codes so entire apartments, schools, buildings, etc wouldn't turn into dust after a big earthquake. You think people are standing around pointing fingers at their governments for failing to keep the poor safe? Yes, I am a bastard.

Seriously, these people need help. Please help.

Eureka

Last night I searched for and found all my music/recording equipment and accessories, and even found a home for them in the office. I'll need to buy batteries for the effects pedals. I also need to re-load my Roxio software onto my computer, because I forgot to do it when I replaced the hard drive last fall.

Wait a minute, where's the mic stand? Either in the basement storage or in the garage. In either place, it's collecting dust.

The photo has nothing to do with my post. It's just a photo I took on a recent jobsite visit to Soldier Field, and it was a beautiful day.

No more dead asses!

Distinguished artist, faithful reader, and all-around good guy James came north for a visit 10 days ago (along with lovely wife and daughter) and we had the chance to hang out and get a few things thought out and talked through.

We paid a visit to Leapin’ Lyrics in Geneva, IL, and now there is another outlet for MusicArt T-Shirts (and hopefully prints and such)!  

We also worked on some of our songs, which are 20 year works in progress.  You know, there are millions of people who write songs together, and they all believe that their songs are good.  We are among them.

“Weddings, Funerals, and Bar Mitzvahs” was our slogan.  We believed (and still do) that we can be professional songwriters.  After our work session Thursday night, I firmly believe we still “have it”.  

I guess the reason I’m not a professional songwriter is because I don’t want it bad enough.  I have a ‘regular’ job, I have a ‘regular’ family, and ‘regular’ responsibilities.  I commend James for wanting to be a professional artist bad enough to find a way to be one.  He has been able to structure a career and family that allows him almost just enough time to be productive and creative.  But he’s the first to admit that it’s very stressful pursuing your dream.

And every time we part company, I feel bad for letting the dream go.  We can do this, but why won’t I get off my dead ass and do it?  For one thing, I love being lazy.  I could create the time to sit down with my 4-track and compose, but I’d rather sit on my rear and vegetate.  Like all the deep thoughts I’m thinking make a bit of difference.  I need to get motivated.  I need to set goals and KEEP THEM!

I have been working on a recording project for a while, well, it’s still in the concept stage.  In a classic instance of putting the cart before the horse, I’ve created the CD cover, picked out all the songs, written liner notes, etc, but haven’t begun any actual recording.  THIS IS SO ME!!!

So tonight, after the city council meeting, I’ll be scrounging through the still-packed boxes in the basement and locate all my recording equipment and accessories.  I’ll find a place to set up a studio area, and as of Oct 1, begin an earnest rehearsal schedule to record this project called (fittingly enough) Woulda Shoulda Coulda.

Turning my back on my gifts is sinful.

Arlo & Janis (& Katrina)

I'm a huge Arlo and Janis fan. In fact, I have a huge crush on Janis; she's very sexy for a pen and ink drawing.

Jimmy Johnson, the genius who created this comic strip, lives in Pass Christian, MS. Rather, that is where his home is. I don't know if he is in his home today or not.

I don't know Jimmy personally, although through his comic strip and website, I have come to know of him, and I admire him very much.

Sometimes we aren't able to grasp the enormity of a disaster because we "turn off" the voices of the strangers who are affected. Jimmy has posted an aerial photograph of Pass Christian with commentary about what buildings used to exist and how neighborhoods were wiped out by Katrina.

The media is busy in other places; we might not see Pass Christian on TV. His website has put a "face" on the disaster that we may be able to relate to.

http://arloandjanis.com/passtour.htm

It begins at home

I received an e-mail from faithful reader James the other day:

"I got quite misty yesterday when (my daughter)came home from school. Her school is gathering pennies in order to raise money. When she came home she did an "extensive" search of the house for pennies. She had just about accepted the fact that she did not find very many. Then she remembered her piggy bank, went up and took out all the pennies. She came downstairs and proudly stated something to the effect that could now help the people hurt by the hurricane. I'm telling you, I hugged and smooched that kid and had to walk away to regain my composure. Egadz! Sometimes the future doesn't seem so bad."

Inspired by his daughters ingenuity and generousity, I decided to discuss this with my kids (ages 9&5). My wife and I explained to them that all these people that we see on TV lost their homes, toys, pets, clothes, books, etc.; and that they were being "asked" to ride on buses many hundreds of miles away to live in an indoor stadium or convention center in a city of someone else's choosing. We reminded our kids that they were very fortunate that we live in a nice home, in a safe town, and have lots of toys, clothes, and a wonderful dog. (Which means a tornado will come and knock my house down next week, because I'm a big believer in jinxes).

We told the kids that we would be giving some extra money at church on Sunday that will be sent to help these families. We asked them if they would consider giving some of the money that is in their piggy banks (yes, they are actual piggy banks) to help these families, too.

My daughter emptied her bank, counted the money, and decided to give about 60% of it. I told her that I was very proud of her generosity, and that her kindness would be returned to her someday.

My son emptied his bank and said that because he has so many nice toys that he didn't need the money, so "those people" could have all of it. Besides, his birthday was only 6 months away, and he would get more money then. $12.67. I thanked him for his generousity and told him that I am indeed a proud father to have such caring children.

They put their money into ziplock bags and proudly put it in the collection basket on Sunday. The folks who count the money each week probably weren't thrilled (although we put slips of paper with the dollar amount in each bag to make it easier to process).

It has been my goal to raise children with a certain "community service conscientiousness". I think I'm on the way.

Thanks again to James and his daughter for the inspiration.

And yes, I'll be sneaking some extra change back into their piggy banks to help rebuild their savings.

Can we just focus?

People are starving, dying, and generally having a lousy time.

Why are we having this debate on whether they are called refugees or evacuees?

Don't we all something more important to do? Like saving them, housing them, and feeding them?

Each time I hear a so-called "community leader" whine about this issue, I want to scream!

Hey, George!

Mr. Bush,

I've always, ALWAYS, given you the benefit of the doubt. But come on, let's pull the old head out of the keister and 1) whack the FEMA guy; 2) put together some plan (even if it is over-the-top authoritarian; and 3) ask your beloved mom to just stay home ( I mean she's a sweet lady and all, but there is never a positive PR outcome when River Oaks Matrons rub elbows with the Great Unwashed).

It is not a sign of weakness to flat out fire a guy who has screwed the pooch, even if you were the guy that hired him in the first place. Actually, it makes you look stronger to do so.

Just handing the evacuees cash isn't going to solve the long term problem. A huge stimulus package needs to be developed so these people can get jobs and get on their feet as soon as possible. Surely we need some roads to be built, or perhaps even a city in southern Lousiana.

Now there's a plan! Employ the affected people to rebuild their city. Hire them, train them, pay them. Yes, it will cost a fortune, but it will cost a fortune either way.

Finger, finger, who gets the finger?

Because this is America in the 21st century, let's start pointing the finger of blame...

At President Bush, for using money that could have been used to make New Orleans safe to the war in Iraq.

At Bill Clinton, for using money that could have been used to make New Orleans safe to make the budget surplus.

At George HW Bush, for using money that could have been used to make New Orleans safe to bail out the Savings and Loans.

At Ronald Reagan, for using the money to end the Cold War.

At Jimmy Carter, for using the money to attempt to bring peace to the Middle East.

At Richard Nixon, for using the money in Viet Nam.

At Lyndon Johnson, for spending the money creating welfare and The Great Society.

At John Kennedy, for spending the money to go to the moon.

At Dwight Eisenhower, for spending the money on the arms race of the 1950's.

At Harry Truman, for spending the money to defend South Korea.

At Franklin Roosevelt, for spending the money to defend our country in WWII, and before that, to pull our country out of the Great Depression.

At Herbert Hoover, Calvin Coolidge and Warren Harding ,for whatever the hell they accomplished during their administrations.

At Woodrow Wilson, for keeping us isolated, then engaging us in WWI.

At William Taft, for eating too much.

At Teddy Roosevelt, for being Teddy Roosevelt.

At Lincoln, for saving the Union.

At Thomas Jefferson, for spending the money that could have been used to save New Orleans, for making the Louisiana Purchase in the first place.

Do you understand where I'm going here? New Orleans has always been this Civil Engineering Textbook Disaster Waiting to Happen. It has NEVER been the political will of our leaders to prevent it. And yet, no shortage of people hesitated to invest their lives in this area because of the risks involved. I don't fault the people for living in New Orleans, I just don't think it's right to point fingers at the last caretaker because the storm hit on his watch.

For God's sake, quite whining about what isn't happening and take some action!!!

Katrina

This isn't about the looters.

There are bad people in this world, as there are good people. The difference is, the bad people get to be on TV, while the good people get to be in magazines.

This isn't about race. This isn't about class.

Anyone could have been stuck in New Orleans (or Gulfport, or Biloxi, or any of the hundreds of small towns that are no longer). Eighty percent is underwater. Here's something to think about: Eighty percent of the people who used to live in New Orleans no longer have....anything. No house, no posessions, nothing.

How would you feel if this happened to you? Your family? Your children?

I don't understand why some people felt the need to steal televisions and jewelry. However, I won't make a moral judgement about them in this case. I do understand, and wholeheartedly agree with the looting of grocery stores. Let's face it, the food is going to spoil, and my children need to eat. I've just lost EVERYTHING, GODDAMMIT!!! So let me feed my family.

I predict that for every person that was rescued from a rooftop, there are 4 people dead inside a home. What we see in terms of devastation in New Orleans is but the tip of the iceburg.

IT WILL NEVER EVER BE THE SAME.

The total cost of impact will be several times that of 9/11, Afghanistan and Iraq.

Just wait till the water is gone.

(photo credit: Marc Serota/Reuters)

21st Century Office

The company I work for was finally free of the terrible lease that the old owners forced upon the new owners, and we built a new facility and moved in today.

I used to have a desk with a couple of file cabinets inconveniently located for my use. The work area was so small that I couldn't keep up with the paperwork that crossed my desk. No amount of "clutter-free" hints, tips, and booklets could help me.

Now, in my new, modern work area (similar to one that every other office puke in America is used to) I have lots of space to fill with my paperwork. Instead of sharing a wastebasket, I'll have one of my very own. Instead of trying to "shush" people while I made phone calls, I have some privacy, and the traffic pattern is no longer centered around my workstation.

The washrooms are modern, and it only takes one flush to take care of my business.

Because I'm a top producer, I have a "window seat" which may sound glamorous, except I have to fight the glare on my computer screen. I'm not really complaining, though. I'm loving it.

Because I have worked for companies that have modern workstations, I expect these kinds of facilities. There are co-workers, however, who are resentful of the move. They don't understand why we needed to move; they are fearful and anxious. Perhaps they feel that way because this move signals that we are in THE BIG TIME. We're the market leader in our industry, and have been of many years. It was painful to bring customers to our old office. I'm very proud of the new place.

Our management has recognized that our self-image could use some polishing. Starting Monday, a new dress code will be in place. It's about time. Our workstations will not be home to meals and radios and lots of photos taped tackily. We're in THE BIG TIME now.

Not to mention, any company that wants to buy us out will have to pony up some real dough, now!!

No longer a little boy

I have a little down time as we pack up our office and move to a new place.

My son graduated to "Big Boy" status last week. He strapped on a back pack and got on a school bus for his first day of school.

I try not to brag too much about my son. Both of my children are great kids. I've written about my daughter in the past; she is a very special girl. My son, who started kindergarten last Thursday, reads at a 2nd grade level, can do math problems including multiplication. He understands most of the jokes in his beloved "Captain Underpants" books. His vocabulary is amazing. His teachers will love him, and he'll have no friends because none of them will be able to conduct a conversation on his level.

Don't get me wrong, he's still 5 years old. He can be the goofiest kid I know. On the first two days of a school, he got lost and ended up with the first graders after lunch.

And the boy loves his Legos. The Legos tell me just how brilliant he is. The things he builds, and the imagination he brings to his creations tell me that we're going to have our hands full keeping this kid interested, engaged, and stimulated. Granted, Legos are much cooler than when I was a kid and had 5 basic blocks in 5 colors. The 'new' Legos allow a child to express himself in amazing ways.

Anyhow, as he was getting on the bus, I mentioned to my wife "we'll remember this day when he leaves for Northwestern".

And suddenly, we both felt very sad, and very old.

Yippee!!

I finally gathered the patience required to learn how to insert links into my template.

It was very easy, once I had a template that lent itself to inserting links.

Never too busy...

....to mention that Pat Robertson is an idiot.

Kid with a New Toy

Now that it's easier to upload photos, I can't wait to start "illustrating" my blog.

Buzz Words

There's a new "buzz" word out there...Soft Core Porn.

In our local newspapers, a cosmetic surgery clinic runs advertisments that feature a buxom woman in a knit bathing suit, showing off a trim tummy and a nice set of breasts. While eye catching, it isn't any more provocative than a swim suit ad in the Sunday Target flier.

In a recent letter to the editor, a reader took the publication to task for running this ad, calling it "Soft Core Pornography". Now, I've seen soft core porn; you know, the stuff that is on Cinimax on late Friday nights. You see naked women, snatches of pubic hair (pun intended), and simulated sex acts. No erections, no money shots. I prefer it to hard core, if only because after Shauna Grant, the whole hard core industry turned my stomach (yes, I know I'm splitting hairs here, but, hey, it's my blog).

A few weeks ago, a co-worker who I admire (and a recent born-again churchgoer) was complaining about the attire of a woman in our office who wore a short skirt on casual day. She said "We've got soft core porn going on in the office". Naturally, my ears perked up. After chatting, I discovered that there are "born-again" groups who are now labelling anything that is provocative as Soft Core Porn.

How quaint.

I guess it speaks well to their ignorance of Soft Core Porn. Afterall, if they really knew what SCP was, they wouldn't be calling swim suit model ads SCP.

Let's all pay attention to this phenomenom; and take the opportunity to educate our righteous brethren to what soft core porn really is.